How to use the help desk.

by **Garmar** Sat Apr 04, 2009 1:12 pm

This forum is for posting a specific question about individual sentences, or even an entire paragraph of your story that needs advice for improving. Whether it be syntax, description issues, or any other questions concerning a specific area of your work.

This is not for posting an entire story.

Example.
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I have an issue with this passage. It just doesn't seem descriptive enough to me.

Clark went to the store to pick up eggs. On his way he met the love of his life, Jody. He didn't know their time together would be cut off so short.

Can anyone offer any suggestions for livening this up?

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Garmar.